Showing posts with label men. Show all posts
Showing posts with label men. Show all posts

Monday, March 30, 2009

Why Men Leave Marriage

This is the reason why marriage was so sacrosanct and all efforts were directed towards preserving it. It has an important place in an individual’s personal life too. It was a goal everyone desired to achieve and once married, a person was supposedly ‘settled’ for good.

Marriage has perceived connotations regarding a person’s character and worth too. Even today a married person is perceived to be someone who is trustworthy, dependable, sensible and capable. Statistics show that married men stand a better chance of getting a job, are more successful and draw more salary annually.

Besides the social implications, there are personal implications of marriage too. Married people are happier, emotionally stable and healthier. They are less likely to indulge in harmful personal habits such as alcoholism, smoking and drug abuse. They are more satisfied and their self-esteem and self-worth quotients are higher than unmarried or divorced people.

The health benefits of marriage also include the mental and psychological implications. Married people are less likely to suffer from discontentment and mental problems such as depression. All these benefits manifest themselves all the more in men.

Research shows that men benefit more than women from marriage and also show greater signs of deterioration after divorce. Women overall cope better with the situations and problems arising due to divorce. Men fare worse than women mentally, emotionally and physically during the post-divorce period. The only area where they are better off than women is the financial situation.

It is also a fact that despite the adverse effects seen on a woman’s life after separation, twice as many women as men seek to initiate divorce. Men, especially during middle age ‘never see it coming’ and are taken by surprise when women ask to bail out of marriage.

Through history it is men who have been the dominating partner in a marriage and even when divorce had a social stigma attached to it, they had more freedom to exercise this option. They also walked away with the better end of the bargain. Men were not ostracized for walking out of a marriage and soon set up a new home and family.

Things have changed since and a lot of divorced men are bitter men as they feel that women find favour with the law. Mothers are sympathized with while fathers are judged harshly. In fact, the situation is such that very often men do not seek divorce because they fear the situation they will find themselves in regarding finances and children, post-divorce.

There are a few recurring reasons cited often by men to seek divorce. They are:

1. No Obvious Problems: At times, sheer boredom or mid-life crisis makes men restless and look for a change in the form of divorce. They want to get out of the rut of daily routine and mistakenly blame their spouses for the problems. Seeking some change prompts them to change jobs, change homes, find a lover or divorce their spouse.

2. Falling out of Love: Many men marry young with inflated ideas of love. After the initial euphoria, they soon realize that they have fallen out of love with their wives and initiate divorce, hoping to find their soul mate or perfect partner thereafter.

3. Cheating: Infidelity or adultery by wives often bruises the inflated male ego so much that any reconciliation becomes impossible. Any transgression, especially the one involving sexual encounters, is difficult for a husband to forgive and forget and often leads to divorce.

4. Different Values and Lifestyles: Differences in value systems and lifestyles often lead to contradictions and conflicts. It leads to greater lack of communication leading to an increasing distance between them. This difference is another major reason for men asking women for divorce.

5. Others: There are a lot of other reasons causing men to divorce such as alcoholism, emotional and physical abuse, wives neglecting husband’s family and friends, child-bearing issues, financial issues, an affair of self, personal habits, mental problems, physical or sexual problems and so on. These issues add to the statistics of husbands asking for divorce though they are not the main reasons as such.

Men asking for divorce or women doing so, is an unfortunate event both ways and leads to a lot of broken homes and dysfunctional families. One should not embark on this sad journey until and unless one is very sure of the enormity of reasons for doing so.


About The Author
James Walsh is a freelance writer and copy editor. If you want to find out more about a solicitor managed divorce see http://www.managed-divorce.co.uk



Monday, March 16, 2009

Online Dating Tips for Men and Women: Dating Online Today

Online dating is one of the the safest and most convenient ways to meet single men or women. But because of the stigma that online chat rooms sometimes suffer from, singles, especially single women, can still feel apprehensive about joining an online dating site.

The following are some basic, common sense safety tips to keep in mind when dating online. Follow these tips, and you should be perfectly fine and be able to enjoy all the benefits online dating has to offer.

Take the following safety precautions, and you'll make absolutely sure that you are not doing anything that could be dangerous.

Do not, under any circumstance reveal any personally identifiable information in your online dating profile, in your personal ads, or in your private e-mails to singles.

Such information includes your real name, specifics about where you live ("I live in London" is ok, though) or any other info that could be used maliciously or simply without your consent.

Use only the communications tools provided by your dating service. They now offer private e-mail, chat, and even instant messaging. You should not invite singles to e-mail you at your regular address, at least until you get to know them better. Use your judgement here.

When you e-mail singles in private, you may want to consider using an anonymous e-mail account at a free site such as Hotmail or Yahoo when you begin getting to know new people. Take your time to establish communication and move at your own pace.

Be careful with your signatures. Many of us use multiple signature lines for our personal and business e-mail correspondence that include our phone numbers and addresses. Obviously you'll want to leave this information out when first contacting any singles you meet through the personals.

Your best option might be opening an entirely new free e-mail account, to use just for your communications with singles you meet online.

Remember, you're in control. No one should ever pressure you into revealing anything about yourself that you want to keep private. Anyone who does is not respecting your boundaries, and is probably not worth contacting further.

For more useful tips please visit us @ http://www.onlinedating4singles.com

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About the Author:
http://www.onlinedating4singles.com
Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/dating-articles/online-dating-tips-for-men-and-women-dating-online-today-535329.html

Friday, February 27, 2009

Tips For Men on How to Improve a Marriage

One of the worst things anyone can do is to take their wife for granted.

In the beginning there was love

When we begin a new relationship, it's so exciting. The buzz, the expectation, the passion...it's intoxicating. We want to impress our prospective partners so we shower them with gifts, buy flowers, go for romantic meals, visit romantic places, all things designed to show your lady how much you love and want her, and hoping to convince her that you're the man for her.

We all do it. It's natural. And yet, many of us let this slip after a few years of marriage. But, I hear you say, we can't afford that lifestyle any more. We want to raise a family, and we must economize. Piffle.

More ways of skinning a cat

So, you need to economize? This is understandable, and almost noble, especially if you want to start a family. But it doesn't mean that you have to stop showing your love for her. Don't think that just because she married you, that you can stop wooing her. Women always need to be shown they are loved, desired and wanted.

Instead of taking her out for expensive restaurant meals, prepare the occasional romantic meal at home. It's so much cheaper than eating out, but more than that, it shows your partner you care, that you have taken the time and trouble to cook for her, and to prepare that private intimate experience to share.

Alternatively you can take her out for a picnic. This has all attraction of preparing a meal at home, but also adds the extra dimension of romantic surroundings if you choose them with thought.

Don't stop bringing her gifts. They don't have to be expensive. A flower picked on the way home, a bottle of wine you can share together...just small things, but things that keep the element of surprise there, that show you still care.

Personal grooming

You should always strive to look your best. There is nothing worse to a woman, than if her once handsome, smart man should turn into a scruffy, dirty slob. By keeping up your appearance, you are not only obviously looking good, but you are keeping her attraction to you alive, and you are honoring her by looking good for her.

That's what she does for you...looks good... for you! It's not for some other Tom, Dick, or Harry, it's for you, and one of the simplest and most effective gestures you can do that will go a long way, is to let her know that you recognize it...often.

The physical manifestation of love

Making love is of course the ultimate show of your love for your partner. Make love often. Not only does it cost nothing (practical but true), it shows your wife that you still care for her. Be a little adventurous (that doesn't mean swinging from the chandelier) be a little naughty...flirting is fun. Above all be gentle and caring.

The key

Showing you still care is the absolute key. Tell her you love her regularly. Not too often. You don't want to spoil the girl, but say it unexpectedly. It's so much more effective.

Always make that extra time for her. No matter what other priorities you may think you have at the time, she is more important to you than anything else in the world. You can always make the time if you bear this thought in mind.

Be kind and considerate. It doesn't mean you have to be effeminate. Women love strong men who, whilst being masculine, can also show them kindness and consideration.

Talk

As simple as it may seem, communication is such an important factor in any marriage. Through life's journey together, you will meet problems. But, if you can meet these problems together, head on, discuss them, and agree the way forward, your marriage will remain strong.


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About the Author:
Want to know more about getting an ex back? Get instant access to a simple plan of action for getting your love back by visiting http://www.getherbackblueprint.com

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/marriage-articles/tips-for-men-on-how-to-improve-a-marriage-760243.html

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